At three o’clock we were supposed to meet
by the fountain at the center of the park,
in a place full of strangers that wouldn’t care,
but will give us our privacy anyway.
It’s easy to find it; look for the angels perched
on top, the dragons slain below them.
You were never one to run late,
you valued your time way too much.
So at 3:15, is it any wonder why I’ll start
to worry and wonder where you are?
But when you never came, it was expected,
it had always been your decision to go or not.
I could not have gone, either. Then again,
I could make the same decision altogether.
Maybe I shouldn’t have waited, or hoped,
maybe I shouldn’t have agreed in the first place.
It seems, though, that wanting to see you
supersedes any rational thought I have had.
See I’m stuck here, wanting what I’ll never have
and hesitating to take another chance.
I’ve forgotten what certainty feels like, yet
it doesn’t seem to matter that much anymore.
I wonder if we’ll have another meeting, but
more than that, I wonder if you’ll ditch me again.
I waited until 4 o’clock, and saw the kids pour in,
excitedly running to the playground,
dragging their parents and nursemaids around.
No phone call, no text message, not one from you
to even ask for a raincheck, for a ‘maybe next time?’
This silence sounds so you, and I’m used to it.
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